Our personal narratives shape our experiences and influence our outlook on life. The stories we tell ourselves, or let others tell us, become the lens through which we accept or reject opportunities in life. One of my life's biggest regrets is how I talked to my younger brother in elementary and middle school. I was always an academic. He was always an athlete. With no idea how impactful my words were, I called him "dumb" and "stupid" way too often. It took its toll. My brother's academics suffered and he never fully owned the incredible versatility of skills and gifts he was - and still is! - capable of. Thankfully, I learned from that. I no longer ever call anyone negative words. Rather, if necessary, I may ascribe actions or behavior to be "dumb" or "stupid", but never the person.
One of my favorite activites is to ask someone what they think they cannot do or are afraid to try doing. Then take some time to consider where that limiting belief comes from. Did someone once (or multiple times) say "you aren't good at xxx" or "you'll never be able to do xxx"? Is the fear based on something real and directly related? If it's difficult to identify where the hesitancy comes from there are a multitude of techniques that can help open your eyes. One is to try free form journaling. Another is to try focused breathwork around that past experience. A third is to experience a guided imagery meditation to revisit the past. Once the moment or words are identified as to who they came from, then it's up to us to release them. You can intentionally choose not to hold on to them any longer. You can actively transmute them into another story, like: "I want to try xxx" or "even if I'm not good at xxx, at least I will have tried".
By recognizing these self-limiting narratives, we can work to shift our perspective. Then as we live a new version of ourselves, we can further ingratiate it by cultivating a mindset of gratitude that paves the way for blissful living.